Sign Language

Scorpio (Oct. 23-Nov. 21)Being in business with someone you don’t think is on the up and up is never fun. However, we frequently end up in situations where we must interact with people we know don’t have our best interests in mind—banks, insurance companies, and the like. Financially, it’s very difficult to make choices that allow us to avoid that type of scenario, but personally it’s often quite simple. This week it gets even simpler, because it will finally be clear that it’s time to ditch that person whose agenda isn’t particularly concerned with your well-being. Cut them loose.Sagittarius (Nov. 22-Dec. 21)Carrying a grudge is much too heavy a burden for someone as usually lighthearted as you, especially because, in most cases, even if you were wronged, you had the good fortune to end up on top. Why waste time on negativity when you were the one who scored the girl/guy, job, or lucky break, despite their best efforts to sabotage you? Surely it’d be more galling to those who wronged you to see you being gracious, happy, and successful, rather than sour, pinch-faced, and mean. Slap a smile on your face already, and remember to enjoy your victories, instead of focusing too much on your near-misses. Capricorn (Dec. 22-Jan. 19)Whom you date, love, or marry should be about the big picture. Not the specifics. If much of your “love” is predicated on the size of a wallet, the massiveness of certain body parts, or the prettiness of a face, I can only hope that the other person recognizes that and flees before things get too serious. Those are the bases for flings, not relationships. While income or sex appeal can and should be pieces of a bigger picture, you ought to have to play “Where’s Waldo” to find them. If they’re front and center, the long-term potential of the connection is probably pretty limited; here’s hoping one of you realizes that before someone gets seriously hurt.Aquarius (Jan. 20-Feb. 18)Aquarians are likely to travel very far before they realize they took a wrong turn. Perhaps you’ll be 90 percent of the way toward being a doctor before you figure out that you really don’t want to practice medicine. Of course, such a revelation or admission could be almost traumatic (for you and whoever paid for your years of schooling), but don’t get too worked up about it. Your first impulse will naturally be to change course immediately—however, that wouldn’t be the wisest decision. Although you should begin to consider alternatives, see this choice through to its next immediate conclusion (graduating from medical school, for instance) before you figure out what’s next. You’ve come this far, after all.Pisces (Feb. 19-March 20)When you’ve gotten into a serious rut, things that you wouldn’t have considered before (such as an affair with a married person, or spontaneously quitting your job) may begin to look very attractive. Of course, you know in your heart that pursuing such extremes can only end in tears, and not just for you. However, that doesn’t mean you must resign yourself to living in an emotional ditch—you need to simply be more creative as to how to escape it. This week should present you with at least three significant opportunities to shake things up without knocking them down completely. Seize them.Aries (March 21-April 19)Hearing that your best friends don’t like the person you’re dating isn’t particularly fun. However, you chose these friends for a reason. If their dislike is based on something superficial, you should question why these people are so close to you. However, it’s more likely that their animosity is based on how your significant other treats you—in which case heeding their unwanted and painful message is warranted, and may keep you from making a terrible decision you’ll regret later. Remember, there’s no need necessarily to end things on the basis of a bad feeling from your buddies; however, slowing them down or changing their direction is probably a fantastic idea.Taurus (April 20-May 20)I’m embarrassed for people who take Fox News (which I consider preposterously biased bullshit) at face value. Unfortunately, there are those who are simply too stupid, blind, or willfully ignorant to see the ridiculousness of that particular paradigm (and others of its ilk). It’s not that I’m afraid of those with different opinions; what I fear is those who can’t even look at the big picture and acknowledge the insanity of such a narrow viewpoint. I’m willing to hear out anyone who’s sane, thoughtful, and reasonably articulate, even if they disagree with me. However, I will unabashedly dismiss anyone whose main m.o. is simply ranting vitriolic nonsense—so should you. Gemini (May 21-June 20)The One Laptop Per Child (laptop.org) charity aims to get low-cost laptops into the hands of impoverished children around the world (and has already distributed more than 2 million laptops). This gives these kids access not only to millions of books they’d never have seen (the laptops come with ebooks loaded), but also the plethora of information and opportunity on the Internet. When someone has so little, it’s hard to imagine how much such a chance could mean. You may not be able to make such a profound and obvious difference in someone’s life this week. However, improving the lot of someone in need, even in small ways, is well within your reach. Please do so.Cancer (June 21-July 22)You made an offer and it was accepted in good faith. Now you’re regretting your decision—not because it was the wrong choice, but because you may be too squeamish, lazy, judgmental, or flaky to follow through on your promise. Acknowledge that you may be demonstrating some of your worst qualities, and use this as an opportunity to outgrow them. Make good on your word, and do so gracefully, not resentfully. You may of course rethink what you put on the table in the future, but since you made this bed, you need to lie in it—without complaint. Leo (July 23-Aug. 22)Leos don’t always have the best work ethic (and if you think you do, just ask a Virgo who knows you well). However, the “lazy Leo” stereotype is hardly accurate. In fact, the Leos I know always make a point—as a matter of personal pride—of doing an excellent job, and efficiently get things done quickly so they can laze about with a clear conscience. This distinction may need to be pointed out to someone who doubts you. However, do so gracefully and smoothly, lest you be “punished” for your efficiency (by being given even more work and responsibility). Virgo (Aug. 23-Sept. 22)Virgos aren’t as frequently passive-aggressive as they’re made out to be. However, when you go there, you go there. No one’s as good as you at firmly pressing the big red DESTRUCT button while appearing to do nothing. Be on the lookout for warning signs that you could be engaged in such behavior (for instance, a good friend might tell you!), and investigate and acknowledge what you really want from the situation. Then act on it. It’s kinder and quicker to pursue your goals directly, rather than simply allowing them to come about through inaction (or maliciously subtle and hard-to-trace action).Libra (Sept. 23-Oct. 22)Don’t ask whether, but rather how, to help. You’re in a position to offer the fruits of your expertise, experience, or common sense to someone desperately in need of them. There is no real ethical issue here if you’re also willing to share these things with others who ask for them, so feel free to step up and allow someone to benefit from your skills, since you’re in such a perfect position to do so. When in doubt, remember: Ignoring those kinds of opportunities never feels good; gracefully embracing them is almost always a win-win.