Sign Language

Scorpio (Oct. 23-Nov. 21)Do ends justify means? What happens when you discover something someone did, after the fact? You’re more or less pleased with how things ended up, so is it worth getting worked up over exactly how it happened? The unsavory methods used to get to this place are over and done with, so can much good come from dredging them up and rehashing them? Whether or not you can simply enjoy the present without being hung up on the past—now that you know more about it—is something only you can determine. I suppose you’ll get to figure it out, one way or another, pretty soon.Sagittarius (Nov. 22-Dec. 21)People who discipline their children (or pets) by beating them need serious, impossible-to-ignore reality checks. It’s one thing to administer a light slap on the wrist in a moment of frustration, and quite another to slap someone in the face, or beat them. Often people do this because they feel helpless to correct an unwanted behavior any other way, and need to be given tools that will work. It may feel daunting to re-educate someone who has so much to learn, but when there’s an innocent at stake, you’d be cruel not to try. Capricorn (Dec. 22-Jan. 19)Sometimes you wish everything was clearly labeled. Wouldn’t it be great if everyone you met had an ingredient list and a warning label of possible side effects? Of course, life is never that simple, especially with relationships (romantic, platonic, or otherwise). Even if people did have warning labels, they’d potentially read differently from day to day. Someone who’s exactly what you need one day could be your kryptonite a month or year or decade later. Stop trying to find the perfect “recipe” with no surprises. It doesn’t really exist (except sometimes for an ephemeral moment here or there). Aquarius (Jan. 20-Feb. 18)Cheating isn’t necessarily about having sex with someone else. The reason shit starts to fly is because of the deception and betrayal involved. Telling the truth is trickier and harder, but much better. If you approached things the right way, often you could have your cake and eat it too. Of course, most of the time people do this kind of thing exactly the wrong way, resulting in a huge, hurtful mess instead. When your choices are a candid (albeit awakward) discussion/negotiation or a huge, hurtful mess, it seems obvious which you should choose. Pisces (Feb. 19-March 20)Bedbugs, apparently, are the new plague. If your house ends up infested, you may discover people giving you a wide berth, excluding you from events, and banning you from their homes. Of course, the persistent pests are an annoying scourge, but not one that should make you a pariah. People are overreacting, quite comically—until you’re the target of their melodrama. I mention this example, because it bears remarkable parallels to something you’re doing: writing someone off for pretty far-fetched reasons, ones that ought not to be taken seriously. Quit it. Laugh it off like the joke it should have been from the start.Aries (March 21-April 19)When you discover a relationship isn’t what you thought it was, you can feel devastated, betrayed, foolish, and deeply hurt. However, as much as that sucks, and as understandable as such feelings are, please remember that this kind of thing happens to pretty much everyone at some point in their lives. While in the company of a few close friends it’s acceptable and probably therapeutic to wallow and bemoan your ill luck, try not to inflict it on everyone you know. This is one of those character-building experiences that will teach you a lot about who you are. Hint: When faced with the choice between becoming bitter and suspicious or choosing to be cautiously optimistic, select the latter.Taurus (April 20-May 20)If someone you know is annoying the shit out of you or repeatedly crossing a line, you’re stuck with two options: eliminating them from your life, or fixing the problem. Retraining a friend, parent, or lover is daunting, and certainly trickier than correcting unwanted behaviors in your kid or employee. However, it’s still preferable to cutting that person out of your life—the only recourse left to you if the stuff you can’t stand doesn’t stop. This will require clear communication of your new boundaries, then firm enforcement of them. This week, at least give it a determined and consistent try.Gemini (May 21-June 20)Sometimes the “right” or “best” solution is simply out of reach, because of finances or your situation. Be creative. If you lack health insurance, addressing health issues becomes a matter of finding alternative care. You can’t always afford the thing you need, especially during the recession, so you have to figure out something else. This is one of those times when your innate resourcefulness and creativity are invaluable tools—unfortunately, you may be a bit rusty in their applications. This week, however, should present several excellent opportunities to dust them off and try to put them to use.Cancer (June 21-July 22)People in glass houses shouldn’t throw stones, as they say. Here’s the thing: We all live in glass houses. No matter how virtuous you think you are, you’re probably crossing a line somewhere. Try not to be judgmental; that is, feel free to judge people and decide whether or not they get to be part of your life, but resist condemning or putting them down in any way. When in doubt, err on the side of kindness, compassion, and generosity. Literally bite your tongue if necessary, because any cutting remarks you make this week are highly likely to come back and bite you in the ass.Leo (July 23-Aug. 22)You’re not much of a joiner. Although you enjoy feeling like you’re part of something larger than yourself, you really have a hard time fitting smoothly into group situations—unless you’re leading or coordinating them yourself. This is normal, Leo. Don’t feel bad for not being a sheep. You’re a Lion! Although being responsible for everyone else’s experience is sometimes exhausting or resentment-producing, it’s also something you’re pretty good at—certainly better at than simply fitting in and following along (especially when you know you could do a better job). Embrace the role you were born to—and when some other able leader steps up and does an adequate (or better) job, have the good grace to play along—and enjoy the break!Virgo (Aug. 23-Sept. 22)Practicing pragmatism is your current challenge. Hurray, something you’re actually good at—or so you think. However, sometimes when societal or peer pressure flies in the face of practicality, it’s incredibly hard to stick to your guns and insist on what you know is best. I’m talking about stuff like waiting to have kids until you’re in better financial shape, forgoing an engagement ring in favor of saving up for a down payment on a house, or choosing the low-paying job you love over the one you know you’ll hate (even if you’re paid extremely well). Once the stakes are this high, it might be harder to choose the practical option than you think—nevertheless, that’s precisely what you must try to do.Libra (Sept. 23-Oct. 22)Our house cat and dog both prefer to eat each other’s food. This seems very much like a case of “the grass is always greener” wherever you’re not. Sound familiar? Libras, in particular, struggle with the feeling that they’re missing out, or that the other guy has it better—even though in your experience, on the occasions when you’ve actually gotten to experience it, you’ve learned that they in fact do not have it better; at best, it’s similar to what you had before, and sometimes it’s actually worse! Keep that in mind this week—instead of jockeying for a supposedly better position, just make the best of (and enjoy) the one you’re already in.