Sadly, shots of Jameson whiskey dropped into pint glasses of Guiness and frat boys running wild with green beads around their necks characterize much of what passes for a St. Patrick’s Day celebration in this town. It’s disrespectful to the Irish, sure, but it’s also just plain annoying for anyone who wants to have a drink tonight without encountering all that silliness. Salvation tonight can be found at Hazlewood, Ballard’s tiny, beloved cocktail lounge. In an effort to both scare away the aforementioned crowds, and to amuse the hell out of themselves and their regulars, proprietors Keith Bartoloni and Drew Church are hosting their second annual “Yacht Rock” evening tonight. What this translates into is a whole lotta vintage cruise wear, soft rock a plenty (provided by a rotating cast of guest DJs, including the Recording Academy’s Michael Stephens and Rain City cinemaphile Chelsea Robinson) and a general air of hilarity. Church has also purchased 70 coconuts in which to serve appropriately ridiculous drinks such as pina coladas and rum punch. If the phrase “yacht rock” leaves you befuddled, here’s a brief tutorial.