A thing of beauty is a joy forever—or at least until you stuff it into your piehole. No expression is more apt for dining at Talarico’s, where at 14 inches, the slices ($3 at happy hour; normally $4.95) are terrifyingly large. Remember the phone booths riddled with fake bullet holes in Godfather’s Pizza joints in the ’80s? Talarico’s takes an adults-only page from that book, with circular leather booths and decadently dim chandeliers, offering straight-up noir with your Coppola (goat cheese, garlic, and roasted red peppers) and Tarantino (kalamatas, green peppers, and onions) slices. The happy hour cocktails are strong and the servers are sweet, but that’s all beside the point—no picture I’ve ever posted on MySpace has generated more buzz than the snap of a Talarico’s slice. I’ll let the comments (12 in five days) explain: “Damn your pizza is fine”; “The pizza is huge!”; “I like how you roll”; “Where did you find a slice that big?”; “Can we please eat there while I visit?”; “My kinda slice!”; “YES!”; “That pizza is bigger than your head!”; “You gotta fold that puppy in half!”; “So sexy!!”; “WHERE’D YOU FIND SUCH A BEAUTIFUL SLICE OF PIZZA?!”; and “Holy shit that makes me so hungry for pizza.” Who knew a girl headed for a heart attack could get so many lunch dates? RACHEL SHIMP 4718 California Ave. S.W., 937-3463, www.talaricoswestside.com. WEST SEATTLE