About a year ago, Cutters Bayhouse, just on the outskirts of Pike Place Market, spent a few million bucks on a remodel. When I asked my server what, exactly, they’d redecorated, he replied, “The pastels. Wasn’t much better than it is now, actually, but at least they’ve gotten the place up to early ’80s.” Cutters has a friendly, Keg-like atmosphere, full of tourists, Eastsiders, and people who don’t know any better. Their white-trash servers, aside from needing a good dental plan, are pleasant and helpful.

Despite the bright lighting and view of the port, the bar’s selection of booze is quite good: single malts, whiskey, and ports are varied and well priced. In addition, their list of wines by the glass is actually one of the best in town (25 selections ranging from a crappy glass of Sutter Home white zin for $4.95 to some sweet Carmenet Dynamite Cab Sauv ’96 that’ll run you 10 bucks a tumbler). Prices by the bottle are also quite reasonable.

Gotta give it to the bar staff, though. They’ve created an adventurous cocktail menu: From Red Delicious coolers (peach-infused vodka!) to sickeningly sweet melon kazis, Cutters really does shake it up. One drink I may have to return for (if I’d mixed it with my tequila and scotch I’d have hurled) is the Blue Martini: gin or vodka, a hint of blue curacao, then garnished with—get this—two Maytag blue cheese-stuffed olives ($7.50). Eewww. 2001 Western, 448-4884. Validated parking (25 hours for a buck).

Bar Joke:

A priest, rabbi, and nun walk into a bar.

The bartender says, “Get the hell out of here.”