Can this Dick’s burger stand up to the gut bombs at Loretta’s Northwesterner?For the second installment of the Dick’s challenge, I wanted to find the most Dick’s-esque of the chain’s competition. That’s how I ended up listening to a Nina Simone record at a small South Park watering hole.Loretta’s Northwesterner (8617 14th Ave. S., 327-9649) is the very definition of neighborhood bar. The bartender knows most of the people sitting at her counter by name, and gets their input on the next LP she puts on; Cat Stevens is the big winner.It’s easy to see why people belly up to this bar. In addition to being a friendly place for libations, Loretta’s makes a reasonable commitment to its food options–no microwaveable dinners here. Explaining the menu options, the barkeep points to the Tavern Burger, saying “It’s basically like a Dick’s burger.”Bingo.At only $3, the tavern burger is still in the Dick’s “pocket change” price point. Though from there, the cost jumps, with a much more loaded deluxe burger coming in at $6.I order several burgers to go, as I have a group of friends/judges back at home ready to chow on burgers over a board game. We all bite into the tavern burger, and immediately there are sighs of appreciation. It is like a Dick’s burger, only better. There’s the standard American cheese slice and sauce, but the patty is thicker, the bun is grilled on what tastes like a skillet coated in butter, and it comes with onions. Loretta’s challenger.Much later that night, in a commitment to scientific observation and to erasing any weight loss we might have achieved in the past two months, we head for the Dick’s on Capitol Hill. As we chow down on cheeseburgers in the car as it’s still too chilly to eat outside, a debate breaks out.Kristian, with whom I got lost trying to get to Loretta’s thanks to the downed South Park Bridge, insists he’d still take two Dick’s cheeseburgers ($1.40 each) over the Tavern Burger. I’m not so convinced–that grilled-bun/thicker-patty combination is very enjoyable to bite into. Then again, Dick’s has chocolate milkshakes, one of which I’m happily slurping in the front seat of the car.Mostly I just feel grateful to live in a city so committed to the availability of cheap, greasy burgers, and that I have friends willing to sacrifice their waistlines for the sake of trying them all.Follow Voracious on Facebook and Twitter.