Of the more than 100 columns I’ve written thus far for seattleweekly.com, I would say that probably a good quarter have been centered around my life as a family man. The “family” pieces are the ones that might be the most widely read.
A couple of months back, I wrote a column about the whole “Bieber Fever” thing, and I used my own daughter as a sort of example within the piece. Until then, my daughter Grace had never really read my column, but she was made aware of that particular piece because it seemed that everywhere she and I went in Seattle after that, people would come up to us and say something like “Duff and Grace! Bieber Fever!!!” Grace was not pleased with me…
And then, just a couple of weeks ago, I wrote another column that touched on the topic of “boys.” It is very safe to say that again Grace was not pleased with me…Yes, she reads my column now.
The other morning, Grace came to me with an already-written column…a sort of response, I suppose. I back it. So without further ado, here is my daughter Grace McKagan’s first ever column—a sort of “Oh yeah, Dad? Take THIS!”
DAD’S DAILY ROUTINE:
7:00 a.m.: Wake Up & Talk REALLLLLLLY Loudly on the Phone with Jeff Rouse About Coffee
8:00 a.m.: Drink Coffee & Watch the News REALLLLLLLY Loudly
9:00 a.m.: Go to the Gym (EWWWWWW)
12:00 p.m.: Eat DISGUSTING Tuna Curry Coffee Bean Protein Shake
12:30 p.m.: Go to the Studio & Record
1:00 p.m.: Coffee
2:00 p.m.: Coffee
3:00 p.m.: Coffee
4:00 p.m.: Coffee
5:00 p.m.: Coffee
6:00 p.m.: Coffee
7:00 p.m.: Coffee
8:00 p.m.: Coffee
9:00 p.m.: Coffee
10:00 p.m.: Coffee
11:00 p.m.: Come Back Home From the Studio
DAD’S BFF’s: (Not in Any Particular Order)
Jeff Rouse
Isaac
Mike Squires
John Potatoes (Varvatos)
Sean Kinney
Tavis LeMay
Scotty P.
Matt McKagan
LuAnn Finklstein
PatrowTrow
Cupcake 123 (Buckly)
Gilby Clarke
Slash
DAD’S EMBARRASSING STUFF:
He Buys Cologne From SEPHORAAAAAAA (The Gucci One)
He Eats Chocolate Like Every Night
He Always Says “age” After Everything
I.E.: Cool “songage,” “manage”
He Takes His Shirt Off ALL THE FLIPPING TIIIIME When it is Hot Outside
He Gets His Hair Colored (He is a 46 Year Old “MACHOOO” Dad)
He is OBSESSED With his BlackBerry
SO UHMMM YEAH PEACE OUT GANGSTAHHHHS THANKS FOR READING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
