Going to festivals always brings out some interesting, and sometimes questionable, clothing choices– mainly so your friends can find you amidst the hundreds of other assholes in Ray Ban rip-offs and ironic tee-shirts– but folks are literally making matching shirts to find each other, which makes me think of summer camp, which does not bring back good memories. Still, at least it makes sense. What does not make sense, however, are all the people I’ve seen kicking it baby-style this weekend. Before this weekend, I had never seen anyone over age two wearing a onesie. But in the past three days, I’ve seen at least half a dozen adult (okay, maybe teenaged) women walking around in what are literally bigger versions of the shorts-and-shirt that babies wear to better facilitate clothing and diaper changes. The only thing the adult versions were missing were the snaps at the crotch. And I had to wonder: What’s next? Diapers under the onesies? Are we as a generation so preoccupied with instant gratification that we’re going to start shitting ourselves so we don’t have to wait in line for the bathroom anymore? I fear for my future now more than ever before.Which brings me to this: while I was not fortunate enough to see the folks allegedly going at it during the Decemberists’ show, I did discover multiple pairs of abandoned panties on the lawn amidst all the garbage. And there was a ton of garbage. It was disgusting. I have never seen so much litter and abandoned, recyclable beer cans in my life. But I guess throwing your trash everywhere is about what you’d expect from someone in a onesie. Next year, I have a radical proposal: let’s grow up, put on big-girl pants and throw our trash away, k? Love, Bitch who hates fashion