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This Week's Horoscopes

By Caeriel Crestin

March 26, 2008

Aries (March 21–April 19)

You're one of the least conflicted people around. This is not to say that you don't have internal dichotomies, or that you never have trouble making up your mind. It's just that figuring out what you want (and what you don't) is easier for you than for most people, and deciding on which side of any given line you'll fall is almost always a no-brainer. This week, however, people may very well mistake you for a Pisces, given how difficult it might be for you to express your position or even understand how you're feeling. Don't panic when things don't immediately resolve into crystal clarity. In this particular case, they may never become clear. You'll just have to get used to navigating in the fog.

Taurus (April 20–May 20)

In your life, there's time to work and time to play, and you nearly never let the two blend. While not mixing business with pleasure might be a good general rule of thumb, occasionally doing so can create an experience that's both fun and profitable. What playfulness can you bring to work that will make it a better place for everyone (including you), but also ultimately more successful? And can you find a way to connect your job to the rest of your life that doesn't detract from it but synergistically adds to it instead? This week, look for one.

Gemini (May 21–June 20)

Stop burning your extra energy uselessly, like a zoo tiger restlessly pacing her cage. If you look for them, this week you ought to be able to find several new outlets for that abundant energy. They could easily soak it all up, and then some. This is a good thing, but it could go too far. Ironically, you don't have quite enough energy or time to realistically handle all of your new distractions in the long run. Some of them will have to go, but not yet. Take this week to try them all out, so when you have to choose between them, you'll be able to make an informed decision about which will stay and which will go.

Cancer (June 21–July 22)

You know gray areas better than almost anyone. Lately, your whole life is a gray area, with so little etched in black and white that your once-swift decision-making skills have gone out the window. Any decision you make has so many positive and negative ramifications that doing the math and figuring out which route would be best would require an advanced degree in quantum mechanics. There is a light shining through the fog, though. Your indecision is caused largely by a lack of information, too many things you just don't know. This week, many of the "ifs" clouding your way are likely to become certainties, making the path before you much more clear.

Leo (July 23–Aug. 22)

Don't become too obsessed with status. What's a title or a trophy, anyway? It's a symbol at best, and sometimes the bequeathing is so loaded with drama and politics that it's robbed of all meaning anyway. What really matters are your relationships with other people, regardless of the labels applied to them or to you. Pay attention to those this week, rather than focusing on some artificial bullshit that's supposed to mean something but actually doesn't. How those you respect privately regard you is ultimately more important than whatever lame-ass public recognition you might (or might not) receive.

Virgo (Aug. 23–Sept. 22)

Forget review. You have this habit of going over and over something ad infinitum—from your shopping list to a love note to any kind of upcoming test of your abilities–until it's "perfect" in your mind. The irony is that you consequently often end up with a much less-than-perfect result, because you've overthought it. Usually your raw first gut inclination is the best one, and your incessant analysis can only rob that of strength. Will you stop doing that, please? This week, especially, go with your first response—it will almost invariably be the best one.

Libra (Sept. 23–Oct. 22)

Get it out. Whatever it is you're holding on to that's making you feel sick, disgorge it this week and get rid of it forever. Personally, I hate vomiting, but I have to admit that when you eat something bad, it's a relief just to get it out. The same can go for the mental and emotional poisons you're hanging on to, because you're reluctant to endure the uncomfortable process of ridding yourself of them once and for all. That's nothing to look forward to, I'll admit, but after the fact I guarantee: You'll know it was worth it because you'll feel that much better.

Scorpio (Oct. 23–Nov. 21)

This week is about balance. Specifically, it's about bringing into your life new elements to create equilibrium with some of the extremes you're already engaged in. Pretend you're a Libra (only not as boring) and figure out where and how to get the stuff you need to bring symmetry and stability to your life. Be proactive here; these things are not going to just fall into your lap. You can't simply be open to them; you have to be aggressive about finding them and inviting them into your life. This week, please go do that.

Sagittarius (Nov. 22-Dec. 21)

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