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Horoscopes

Published on November 26, 2003

Sagittarius (Nov. 22-Dec. 21)

You're more shadow than person right now. People are mostly perceiving you in two stark dimensions, instead of grasping and appreciating your full, multidimensional complexity. There's little you can do about that, unfortunately; you can't force people to look at you in exactly the way you wish. The best you can do is cut a striking profile in silhouette and hope that it's enough to hold the interest of these shallow fools, until you fall into a different light and they can see all the Technicolor dimensions of who you really are.


Capricorn (Dec. 22-Jan. 19)

What's this? Why, your normally reserved demeanor flies right out the window when a certain person enters the room! You light up like a Christmas tree, darling, all sparkly and warmand it's obvious to everyone who knows you except this one sweet person (who must be amazing to elicit such an incredible burst of radiance from your shyest depths). That person, delightfully, thinks you're always this lively and vivacious, so s/he has no idea what a difference s/he makes. S/he deserves to know, already, as much as you deserve to get to shine and embody your best brightest self all the timesomething which just might happen once you spill your secret.


Aquarius (Jan. 20-Feb. 18)

Novel writing is a process; as I work on mine, I'm constantly astonished at the incredible evolution certain characters have undergone, from conception to the present moment. They might as well be totally different people, they've diverged so completely from how I first imagined them. But I could never have envisioned them as they are now without first having conceived of them as all their previous incarnations. The lesson in all this? You can't rush the process. As much as you'd like to simply leap to the finish line, and to who you'll be then, that's impossible. You can't get to point F without visiting points A through E first; therefore, enjoy each stop for what it's worth.


Pisces (Feb. 19-March 20)

Much of your bad luck is preventable. You may have been the victim of some of the shit the world throws at peoplebut that's at least partially because you've been making yourself such a broad target, through a range of (or perhaps just one particularly effective) self-destructive behavior. Don't be a martyr; it's tiresome and, ultimately, not all it's cracked up to be. Instead, take a step outside yourself; get the help you need, and quit your awful, insidious (often deviously subtle) soul-killing habits. Do it now, because each spin around any self-destructive spiral is worse than the one before.


Aries (March 21-April 19)

I was too rebellious to read books I was assigned in school; I hated that they interfered with whatever reading I was doing on my own. Consequently, I never experienced many amazing books until years later, when I was suddenly kicking myself for not giving Toni Morrison or Charles Dickens a chance when some wise teacher had instructed me to. I'm just thankful that I was smart enough to eventually expose myself to their explosive brilliance; now I feel deliciously scorched by it. This week you, too, are due to finally reap the benefits of taking advice you were issued (and refused) years ago. You may not wish, exactly, that you'd taken it to heart then, but you'll be awfully glad that you took it now.


Taurus (April 20-May 20)

You're an acquired taste these days. That's not a bad thing; much of the best food, music, and people can be described that way. The bad news is that your universal appeal has waned; you're probably propositioned less than in the old days. But the good news more than makes up for it: The overtures you do receive are more thoughtful, serious, and worthwhile. Entertain them with an open mind and heart. Be proud, sweet Taurus. You've become more yourself in less time than even I expected, and that's never a bad thing.


Gemini (May 21-June 20)

Amish teens are encouraged to venture out into the world in order to understand what they're giving up (like drugs, dancing, and TV) before they make the conscious choice to join the church and community for life. This period is called rumspringa. It's an amazing tactic. As a consequence of being allowed this freedom and choice, Amish children have an amazingly high return rate; more than 80 percent of them, after tasting the supposed luxuries of the world their community shuns, decide to return and commit themselves to the simpler life in which they were raised. Before you give up anything this week, or in the weeks to come, make sure you've had your own rumspringa and drunk deeply at the well you'll be abstaining from. Then make your choice with a clear conscience, knowing it couldn't be more conscious.


Cancer (June 21-July 22)

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